There are three solvable reasons why we have low self-esteem.
Low self-esteem can lead to a number of serious problems: from health to emotional and financial. Psychologists have singled out three main reasons why we do not value ourselves, and which we can fight.
Misses and rejections
Happiness researchers have found one thing: a 40 percent level of happiness depends on recent events in our lives. The end of a relationship, the death of a loved one, dismissal from work and illness are the factors that harm us the most. Since we evaluate ourselves through such events, so does the decline in self-confidence.
People who have lower self-esteem, suffer longer after life falls. The lack of self-confidence caused by such failures can be overcome by:
– Let’s take enough time for ourselves.
– We do not isolate ourselves from the environment.
– We’re talking to friends and family.
– We will be ready to implement the new strategy.
Many of us are afraid of situations in which we have to talk to people we don’t know – at parties, family gatherings or job interviews. We are afraid that people will misunderstand us, pay attention to our negative traits. Almost all of us have negative experiences interacting with others; we were rejected or ridiculed, parents were not impressed with our successes … the list is long. Social phobia can be overcome by:
– We do not allow our internal critic to spread. We are constantly reminded of our good qualities.
– Let’s think of topics in advance that we will discuss with people we don’t know well.
– We don’t avoid company.
– We set ourselves realistic goals; and a short conversation with strangers at the party is a step forward.
– We focus on other people.
Perfectionism and self-confidence
Many of us have very high standards in everything we do. The best grades, the most talented children, the perfect husband, a challenging job … but, unfortunately, life does not go the way we wanted and not everything depends on us. If we are constantly disappointed because we are not as perfect as we thought, we will end up with a completely ruined self-confidence, which can lead to serious health problems: depression, insomnia, fatigue, eating disorders …
We can fight perfectionism by:
– We value ourselves according to the work we have invested in something, and not according to the results of procedures that often do not depend on us.
– Let’s answer the question – if I improve at least 10 percent in an area, would I get the desired result? If the answer is no, it is not worth the effort.
– We understand that perfectionism is based on the principle of all or nothing, and such situations in life are rare.
– Let’s learn to love the way we are.