Male friends ennoble our lives in a way that girlfriends could never. Here are tricks on how to bring a little testosterone into your social life.
In my teens and early twenties, my friendships were gender blind. More than half of the guests on my birthdays were my Platonic male friends. After some years, while planning the wedding, I was shocked to learn that there was only one man on my guest list! Where did my so many male friends evaporate?
The fact is that many friendships are difficult to survive when you enter into a serious relationship. According to researchers from Oxford, on average you lose at least two close friends when you settle down with someone. The reasons are usually: moving to a new city (for love), free time that you dedicate only to your partner, entering a completely different life and having fewer and fewer points of contact with the old society. Male friends, judging by my case, are even easier to lose sight of.
The research is specified only on male-female friendships that fall into oblivion and experts usually bring it into contact with a new partner (yours or his). Jealousy of a partner is the main reason for breaking off friendships with the opposite sex.
There is one kingdom in the world …
Despite the obstacles, experts claim that there are certain benefits that friendships with men can bring. The view from the male angle is just one of them. Understanding the way they think, feel and behave are some more. In vain for hours with friends you try to understand why men harass you, just ask a friend, who will reveal the mystery to you with ten or fewer words. Men’s advice is useful not only in cases of disagreement with a boyfriend or brother, but also with the boss.
The time spent with the other is also devoid of resentment and yelling (so normal in a relationship between two friends), and is completely liberating. No need to impress anyone, no counting calories, no traditionally female competition and outwitting, you are simply relaxed with a male friend!
Women are natural rivals, they often compete for the same things in life, while men play their game on another field, according to completely different rules. When you tell your best friend that you are pregnant, he will not feel jealous, which is often the case with friends!
And when it comes to maintaining friendships, they are less demanding. A friend will be worried and resentful if you don’t call her for a week or come to the party. Socializing with men is less dramatic, because they expect less, and they are more fun! How can you not love them?
As much as better!
If you intend to expand the circle of male friends, we have good news! Thanks to the freedom that today’s society gives us, gender equality in the workplace and in general, male friends, it seems, has never been easier to gain.
It is also interesting that today we are quite similar in interests! Men and women go to gyms together, but also to cooking classes, and it is not uncommon for someone’s friend to show up for a poker dinner or watch an important football match! Similar interests and shared experiences are also a fertile ground for developing Platonic connections.
To be sure that this friendship will not grow into something else, you must harmonize your words and deeds with your intentions! An invitation to dinner, for example, sends a completely different message to your friend than a simple invitation to spend an afternoon together!
Eventually, relationships become how others define them, so it’s important and necessary to let others know you’re just friends!